ᗪ丨丂匚ㄖ尺ᗪ丨卂几 Ɋㄩㄖㄒ乇丂

If organized religion is the opium of the masses, then disorganized
religion is the marijuana of the lunatic fringe

If Jesus was
Jewish, then why did he have a Puerto Rican name?

If, on the other hand, you would rather join the Bavarian Illuminati,
you have to bury your bank account in a cigar box in your yard. One of their
underground agents will find it and contact you

All bowling alleys are sacred to Discordians and, if
necessary, you must give your life to protect them from desecration - if
anyone ever decides to desecrate bowling alleys. Finally, you must not rest
until all the sheep are brought into the fold. (And when we convert all the
sheep we are going to the dogs next, then wolves, goats and, at the anointed
hour, human beings.

Who can say how many seminarians read the Principia and decided
to change vocations and become clowns, or many landlords it has caused to
sell their estates and buy yachts or airplanes for smuggling marijuana,

Slim Brooks was just an ordinary merchant seaman dwelling in the
New Orleans French Quarter until he read Principia Discordia. Then he
became the mysterious Keeper of the Submarine Keys who would never tell
anyone what submarine or why it was locked

We too, pay homage to fire in
certain circumstances - such as when it is burning the writings of false
prophets or is producing inhalable quantities of cannabis smoke

We asked Eris about this and She said Kali is short for the Greek Kallisti,
which was engraved on the party-crashing Golden Apple of Discord dealt
with later on in this informative volume. She added that Her own full name
is actually Eris Kallisti Discordia, but took the Fifth Amendment when we
asked if this means She and Kali are one in the same.

But joining me will entail sacrifices because a Discordian surfer
will be prohibited from owning anything but a surfboard, trunks, a
toothbrush, a beach towel and an automobile (maybe a hot rod or dune
buggy). Because surfing is not just a sport; it’s a lifestyle. And
Discordianism is not just a religion; it is a mental illness

Where do you figure he learned 17 languages - including Upper and
Lower Swahili?” one of the officers wondered aloud.